Editor’s note: We all love movies, but rather than ask a syndicated columnist who has never visited our beautiful High Desert, we commissioned our own local movie critic: Nolan P. Smith to review films and give us a local perspective. Enjoy!
High Desert Daily
(Victor Valley)— Sharks: they strike fear in the hearts and souls of many of us. Hollywood has never helped with that fear, with films like the Jaws franchise, Open Water, and Deep Blue Sea to name a few. Yet, we love to feel that terror from the safety of a movie theater seat, knowing we can close out eyes or walk away at any moment. Shark Night 3D is the latest shark flick, but does it pack a bite?
First, lets address what one would expect when going to see a film named Shark Night 3D. First off, sharks, and lots of them: sharks attacking people, sharks striking terror, sharks being the stuff that ignites our nightmares. Next, plenty of night time setting; since the film is named Shark Night. Lastly, 3D, which should have sharks in your face, scaring away what little courage you mustered up to see the film in the first place. No one would expect any award winning acting or screenplay, just a violent, fun movie. Well, sorry, you don’t even get that.
Shark Night 3D comes from Director David R. Ellis, who directed a few of the Final Destination movies, as well as Snakes on a Plane. The actors come from a crop of straight to DVD releases and other unsuccessful horror flicks, and their acting ability shows why. The plot and dialogue of the film feels like a few college kids decided to write a script, throwing in tired clichés and “really?” moments throughout the film. I would talk about the plot, but there really isn’t one to talk of: a bunch of college kids go to a house by the water, enter sharks and cornball local villains. But that isn’t even the worst part: the worst part is it is PG-13. Yes, someone had the brilliant idea to make a shark horror film PG-13, therefore limiting seeing any actual shark attacks.
Speaking of sharks, they don’t really shine in this film either. The animals look very stiff and lifeless, not really making anyone afraid. Plus, the different shark attack incidents that did happen on screen are so farfetched for even this type of a film. The film mainly stays with the college kids and the villain locals, making you wonder of the film should have been renamed “Boring College Lake Night 3D” instead. The 3d was very disappointing as well, as the main parts in 3D were underwater scenes with seaweed and coral; yes, that is as much fun as it sounds.
All in all, you want to steer clear of this trout of a shark night. This time of the year usually brings some less than stellar films, and Shark Night 3D proves it.